January 25th, 2012

I don’t know why but I’ve always been tempted to start my blog entries with over the top drama. Like most people, I think my motivation factor when it comes to writing springs from gloom and darkness. You bet, it’s quite unfair. My life is sprinkled with much happiness and excitement, in the same way that i experience sadness. If it’s true that the universe reflects how you look at life, then I might be sending the wrong signals. This time, I resolved not to be a pain in the ass by emphasizing too much on the drama factor, lest I create the impression of living a very boring existence.

Not at all. Scratch that. Definitely NOT.

A working mom proves to be a challenging role. Then again, everything is compensated when you come home to a family…a real one…with arts/crafts materials littered on the floor, or candy wrappers inserted on some crevice…where kids sometimes quarrel on petty things, where a husband gyrates in front of you like a porn star, but embraces your flaws and goodness just the same especially during your most vulnerable moments.

Now, am I not being dramatic again? (Smiley)

The first month of the year came out pretty well. I had several good news to boot, and some lessons learned too:

1. Never underestimate the power of old age. Some people gets sharper and smarter as they approach twilight, they’ll sometimes hurt you with the tip of their sharp edges! Nonetheless, learn from their wisdom. I just finished organizing a workshop where the bigwigs of my insti attended. To me, that was quite a feat to be convening all the senior consultants and partners in such a short time but I made it. Save for some mishaps, everything else was a-okay.

2. Be open and diplomatic. Criticism is a good thing, as they say. You just have to learn how to extract the gold from the trash

3. It’s possible to do a one-man-show/multitask to the hilt, to fail and succeed at the same time on your tasks, so never be sorry for the mishaps/disasters — those are meant to improve and sharpen your learning curve

4. Never give in to what others will say behind your back. They can crush you down only if you listen to their unnecessary whims. If there’s anyone more knowledgeable about yourself — it would be YOU. No one else, period. Hold on to yourself no matter what. Trust, love, and believe in your own capability. Remember that this world is transitory. We know not what happens in the course of time. Talent, beauty, intelligence, power — they all wane and disappear. They eventually become irrelevant. But wear a good heart and you’ll leave a legacy worthy of emulation even after your own “finish” line!

There goes! Way to go….

Some “Techie” Stuff and Being in Transition

December 27th, 2011

I usually leave all techie-related concerns to the more techno-savvy guy that is my husband. Computers and electronics are his domain, his mini-universe. He thrived well in it like a fish to the sea.

But these days, I seem to have found just the right amount of wisdom in buying my own gadgets, minus his advice. For once, I saw him buy the same phone I bought for myself. That convinced me that maybe, I am improving in “his” department. There is fun every time we exchange notes about the best android apps, or when tells me about the anti-virus software, when I show him the lovely themes I unearthed at the market site. Same thing goes for my new found love for Kindle. All my collections were from his e-reader. I think it goes without saying how two people must have a few things to enjoy in order to build a stronger union (Ugh. Why do I always hear a nasty buzz inside my head? Shooo!)

On another note, I feel the need to re-examine how my existence has been. Generally speaking, 2011 has been rife with worthy triumphs and unspeakable challenges — at work and career, personal relationships, spiritual life, even in love. But mostly, the year has been a good one. I realize this as I look back and ponder. Have I become my self’s better version? Or have I messed-up big time?

My life, just like everybody else’s, is not free from ugly imperfections. In fact, mine is filled with unmindful decisions, dumb judgments, and sometimes, shameful paralysis (not knowing what to do). Which reminds me about what Churchill once said, “If you are going through hell, keep going” — for how else can you recover from failure or problems if you will continue to wallow in self-pity. Nothing comes out when you keep all the anger to yourself. One day you might just see your brain burst wide open in protest. Why don’t you fight and release all that has to be flushed out of your system. The magic word: keep going!

For all the blessings, for keeping my entire family safe and healthy, for keeping us all together — I will forever be grateful. My family provides the necessary inspiration to fuel me to do what I must. Although sometimes, I also start to wonder if I am doing a good job as far as parenthood is concerned. Our lives is our message to the world, might as well make it inspiring.

We may be guilty at times of succumbing to plain dumbness, but we will never be forsaken by the One. Ever wonder why when we are about to fall flat on our face, an unknown force lifts us up, and makes us see the bright side?

My battlecry as I transition to 2012? When life give you lemons, cut them in half and squirt life in the eye!



Random Thoughts on a Cold Thursday Afternoon…

December 22nd, 2011

You told me to stop being this and that, after my attempt to hide my misery and after fighting the urge to cry a lachrymose river. I wish yesterday wasn’t real, but you said it so right — it happened for a reason. Bad things happen to those who are bullheaded and don’t learn their lesson well.

Actually, your observation is partly correct. Most of the time, I tend to over-believe in human goodness…that  people are absolutely good and are not capable of hurting others in any way possible.

Not the case in “real” life, though. Out there, its a dog-eat-dog world. Some will use charm to lure you and bait you and before you even knew it, you have been branded a victim.

It’s sad that even at Christmastime, scammers/opportunists work double-time, competing with Santa Claus. They will rob you of anything they can. If you aren’t the scrutinizing type, if you are gullible, well then sorry. Flashback to the first time I was victimized by a robber, that early, I knew I can be an easy prey to friendly people with hidden motives. I thought that will be the last time. Remember? I cried the whole week, left my teaching job, moved place, and found a brand-new life. I recovered the money I lost, several times over. I even helped my folks back home.

But it happened again this time.

In a sense, you said I am lucky. At least in those situations, I don’t have to fight for dear life. Thus, in the succeeding weeks and months, you offered a solution. Thank you, I think its a magnificent idea.

How difficult it is to keep your life abloom when out there you are surrounded by peril. Imagine Damocles’ sword hanging over your head. My impression is that the humanity has come to a point when “guilt” or “conscience” has become irrelevant. With all the sufferings and poverty we have, some important virtues no longer apply to most people. What matters for them is that they continue to live, no matter what it takes. But I don’t get why some people (especially those who wouldn’t actually qualify as poverty-stricken) make fraudulent activities their bread and butter! To me, they are nothing but blood-curdling cosmic dusts who deserve to be extinguished on the face of the universe!

Of course this is cliche but I often forget this one: we should trust only to those who deserve it. We need to be cautious at this perilous times. And whatever purpose or message God is giving me through this, I know it will be for the better. Whatever business He has for me, I know it’s meant to enrich my whole being.

And hey, thanks for comforting me. I love you more for that.

Happy Birthday, My Precious Daughter

December 7th, 2011


We celebrate your birthday, as you turn ten today,
but we have got the gift, just the perfect gift,
that on this very special day, God gave away,
a gift of love from up above, so unique and so rare 

God has specially made you to the very tip of your nose,
as precious as a flower, as tender as a rose.
Fulfilled and blessed our lives we have and all because of you,
as sweet as honey, so innocent and pure

The twinkle of your eyes is brighter than any star,
the smiles you leave behind keep our days bright,
though our laps you have outgrown,
you will never outgrow our hearts

We watch and pray as you grow,
in love and in faith, in beauty and in grace,
you bring us joy and pure delight,
just to gaze upon your lovely face

Our hearts you keep warm and are with you wherever you may go,
and as you go on life’s journey, only happiness may you find,
you are the joyful moments through our sorrow,
you are our hope and promise of our tomorrow

’cause you are our pride, our unconditional love we pledge,
’cause you are our joy, our undivided bond we cherish,
’cause you are our sunshine, our embrace is your shield through the rain,
’cause you are our little girl, our hugs and kissed will take away your pain

We asked God for a flower and He gave us a bouquet
we asked God for a minute and He gave us a day
we prayed to God for true love and He gave us that too
we prayed to God for an angel and He gave us you

May God bless you dear angel
especially on this day, that marks your birth,
for all the special ways you bring
a bit of heaven into our world

May God bless you, Today, Tomorrow and Always
in Peace in Health in Happiness and in Love

Source: Happy Birthday Daughter, Birthday Poem for Family

Murphy’s Law, or Not

December 7th, 2011

My two-year-old ATM card has gone without a trace. Not even a plain “bye” or “good riddance, you ain’t givin’ me fat paychecks! No way I’m staying!”.

So now, I am left with a lovely ten peso coin in my purse. If I may add, I was also able to reach home “late” on the very day I lost my ATM card.  Turns out, the driver forgot the very basic function of gasoline on his vehicle. He didn’t mind checking if his jeepney will still run all the way to San Jose  from Cabanatuan. The passengers, including yours truly,  looked like some poorly-jammed sardines in a small can.

I came home late, stayed longer at our house’s gate than usual. The man was sick, the kids probably didn’t notice my SMS asking for someone to please come down and open the gate for me.

And this is how I came to remember Murphy’s Law.

Murphy’s Law is a popular adage that states that “things will go wrong in any given situation, if you give them a chance,” or more commonly, “whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.” (Wikiquote)

However, I would love to think about it this way. Sometimes, things go haywire because they  have to. No warnings. No clear signals. Maybe because a bigger purpose is about to unfold. Do you will for bad things to happen? Only masochists and sadists do that. As much as possible, we wish for things and situations in our life to go smoothly: for the kids to get the gold in Math competitions, for you to “somehow” receive your cash bonus (smiley), for the husband to raise funds for the car (uhm, that was quite a consumerist mindset), so on and so forth.

But clearly, we don’t cross the line into full-on Byrne-esque kind of disposition when it comes to achieving some sense of positivity. Not to the point of blurring-out or not recognizing that misfortunes or bad moments may actually exist in real life. Murphy’s law or not, we have to accept that things, whether good or bad, happen. It may be out of pure coincidence or the other way around. Then again, it is the attitude that counts. Like they always say, you create your own destiny, you create your own self. How else can you be a better creator than by acquainting yourself with good and bad, sweetness and bitterness (of life), happiness and sadness?

After a string of unlikely situations, thank heavens for clarity and peace of mind…and support people…I’m back to the happy ol’ me…no stress…

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